My mental escape, a frantic need (POEM)

My mental escape, a frantic need,

No time for questions, no planting of seed.

Just running, running, a soul takes flight,

Away from shadows, towards the light.

Into the wild, where tall trees stand,

Through sunlit air, an untamed land.

A boundless freedom, cool and deep,

Secrets the silent forest keep.

Oh, I can feel it, the sweet release,

A fragile moment of vital peace.

Away from my life's harsh reality,

A sacred haven, just for me.

Here, I can breathe, and truly stray,

From the sharp edges of yesterday.

I cling to sanity, hold it fast,

Lest this fragile tether finally cast

Me into madness, a swirling void,

By every crushing truth destroyed.

I try, oh how I try, to turn away

From that dead voice, whispering decay.

I crave to be free from this deep-felt pain,

A wound too vast, too hard to explain.

Tragedy brought me to this dark shore,

Pain broke me, to my shattered core.

Loss left its mark, a deep imprint,

Of joys I lost, every single hint.

I will never smile, truly, in my real plight,

Not in the glare of life's unforgiving light.

But in this escape, wide and free,

A genuine smile blossoms on me.

Here, I am whole, vibrant, unrestrained,

The me I long for, perfectly unchained.

My mental escape, oh let me explain,

A place where hope begins to reign.

It's going to happen, it must for me,

Happiness, joy, a blossoming spree.

Oh God, my God, you hear my plea,

In this mind-haven

Oh God, I keep getting up (Poem )

Oh God, I keep getting up, though life has been so hard,

A path of thorns and ashes, my very soul is scarred.

A long, long road I've traveled, to see this dawning light,

Through healing's fragile promise, and pain that stains me bright.

Grief has become my shadow, my unwanted, constant guest,

A dye upon my spirit, enduring every test.

I saw my husband falter, his last, beloved breath,

A part of me went with him, into the arms of death.

Yet, God, I kept on rising, from that devastating fall,

I lost five of my children, I answered sorrow's call.

Each tiny life a universe, extinguished in the night,

But still, I kept on rising, toward the fading light.

Oh God, do You see me trying? Do You see the effort made?

I lost my dearest mother, a love that cannot fade.

Still, I kept on rising, through every bitter tear,

Conquering the silence, conquering the fear.

No one likes me, no one loves me, the man who did is gone,

My world grew cold and empty, from dusk until the dawn.

But God, I kept on rising, with a strength I couldn't find,

A will to face the darkness, and leave the past behind.

Oh God, I am ready now for fun, for laughter, sweet and clear,

Ready for a smile again, to banish every tear.

To feel the joy of living, to dance with light and grace,

To find a moment's stillness, in this weary, worn-out place.

And always, through the anguish, the burdens I have borne,

My spirit kept on lifting, greeting every morn.

Please, let me reach the sky, back home, where peace resides,

Beyond the earthly sorrows, where my true freedom hides.